Author Topic: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread  (Read 193585 times)

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Offline triggs

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2800 on: Wednesday 28 November 2018, 02:51:38 pm »
Putting a load of baby stuff on eBay:

"This one's 9-12 months, is that UK or US size?"
Tbf the average 9 month old in America is probably about 8 stone
"Lots of young fellas runnin' around in shorts, that's the kind of think you like looking at, and I bet you like that too, only you're probably imagining what they'd look like without shorts, you're sitting there imagining that with a big smile on your face, ya dirty fecker"

Offline madras

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2801 on: Wednesday 28 November 2018, 02:55:12 pm »
Putting a load of baby stuff on eBay:

"This one's 9-12 months, is that UK or US size?"
Tbf the average 9 month old in America is probably about 8 stone

I did actually check if the sizes were the same  :embarrassed: I mean I thought it was quite possible that there may be some difference.





There's  not.
Bullshitters misrepresent themselves to their audience not as liars do, that is, by deliberately making false claims about what is true. In fact, bullshit need not be untrue at all.

Rather, bullshitters seek to convey a certain impression of themselves without being concerned about whether anything at all is true. They quietly change the rules governing their end of the conversation so that claims about truth and falsity are irrelevant.

Offline Tomato Deuce

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2802 on: Wednesday 28 November 2018, 03:28:53 pm »
Putting a load of baby stuff on eBay:

"This one's 9-12 months, is that UK or US size?"
Tbf the average 9 month old in America is probably about 8 stone


HAHA

Offline La Parka

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2803 on: Wednesday 28 November 2018, 03:58:38 pm »
Murican baby clothes are a bit smaller from my experience. Oshkosh carter's etc are about 3 months smaller in general compared to UK :milner:

Offline Lotus

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2804 on: Wednesday 5 December 2018, 11:48:47 am »
Me: What did you learn at school today?

Daughter: We've been learning about Greek myths, like Harpys.

Me: So, tell me what you know about Harpys?

Daughter: Well, they have the face of a woman but they fly and have talons and they live in a cave in Crete.

Wife: What, like a mermaid?

Me:............................wtf?
The aim of science is not to open the door to infinite wisdom, but to set a limit to infinite error.

Offline Lotus

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2805 on: Saturday 8 December 2018, 03:52:09 pm »
2 in a row for me....

At lunch and Horrible Histories is on in the background.

Me 'Odd how Bedlam has become a word in the English Language. From the name of an asylum to a verb.....'

Wife 'Yeah, it's where Jesus was born wasn't it?'
The aim of science is not to open the door to infinite wisdom, but to set a limit to infinite error.

Offline sadnesstan

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2806 on: Saturday 8 December 2018, 03:55:57 pm »
2 in a row for me....

At lunch and Horrible Histories is on in the background.

Me 'Odd how Bedlam has become a word in the English Language. From the name of an asylum to a verb.....'

Wife 'Yeah, it's where Jesus was born wasn't it?'

Is bedlam a verb?

Offline sadnesstan

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2807 on: Saturday 8 December 2018, 04:44:37 pm »
Isn't there some historical relationship between th and d? Or am I thinking of th and y?

Offline Lotus

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2808 on: Saturday 8 December 2018, 04:50:19 pm »
p*ss on someone else's chips, you two...
The aim of science is not to open the door to infinite wisdom, but to set a limit to infinite error.

Offline sadnesstan

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2809 on: Saturday 8 December 2018, 04:56:16 pm »
Probably, dunno. But wouldn't surprise me.

Ye olde English, like. Wasn't th- introduced as a result of German influence? Might have imagined it, but the introduction of asylums sounds like a Germanic kind of thing.

Offline newsted

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2810 on: Saturday 8 December 2018, 06:05:58 pm »
2 in a row for me....

At lunch and Horrible Histories is on in the background.

Me 'Odd how Bedlam has become a word in the English Language. From the name of an asylum to a verb.....'

Wife 'Yeah, it's where Jesus was born wasn't it?'

Is bedlam a verb?

No.

The place was Bethlem (Royal Hospital).

Bedlam was its nickname and means confusion, Kaos etc. So seems logical it entered the national lexicon, to me. 

Chaos.

Probably, dunno. But wouldn't surprise me.

Ye olde English, like. Wasn't th- introduced as a result of German influence? Might have imagined it, but the introduction of asylums sounds like a Germanic kind of thing.

Scandos. It was their way of writing "th". Þ. Looks a bit like "y".
:) As you were.

Offline Troll

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2811 on: Saturday 8 December 2018, 06:07:27 pm »
Isn't there some historical relationship between th and d? Or am I thinking of th and y?

 Ð/ð (from old English and Icelandic) is pronounced "th".  It's why Ragnar Loðbrok is pronounced Lothbrok but often spelled Lodbrok.

Offline sadnesstan

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2812 on: Saturday 8 December 2018, 06:16:16 pm »
p*ss on someone else's chips, you two...

It was never my intention to p*ss on your chips, mate. But if you will leave them in the urinal whilst you take a hot stinking dump, then what do you expect me to do?

I thought I'd missed something.

Offline Odin

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2813 on: Sunday 9 December 2018, 03:06:59 am »
My missus text me earlier to say she’d be shopping in town then told me to ring her if I wanted to “ronday view” with her.

She works as a teacher...
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Offline Haz

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2814 on: Sunday 9 December 2018, 05:07:11 am »
2 in a row for me....

At lunch and Horrible Histories is on in the background.

Me 'Odd how Bedlam has become a word in the English Language. From the name of an asylum to a verb.....'

Wife 'Yeah, it's where Jesus was born wasn't it?'

Outstanding.
Drinking alcohol never solves anything. But neither does drinking milk.

It matters not how strait the gate, How charged with punishments the scroll. I am the master of my fate: I am the captain of my soul.
- William Ernest Henley

Offline madras

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2815 on: Saturday 15 December 2018, 11:23:58 am »
She rang "are you home ?"

Me "You rung on the landline"
Bullshitters misrepresent themselves to their audience not as liars do, that is, by deliberately making false claims about what is true. In fact, bullshit need not be untrue at all.

Rather, bullshitters seek to convey a certain impression of themselves without being concerned about whether anything at all is true. They quietly change the rules governing their end of the conversation so that claims about truth and falsity are irrelevant.

Offline Bimpy474

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2816 on: Saturday 15 December 2018, 12:38:25 pm »
She rang "are you home ?"

Me "You rung on the landline"

That's my Mum to a tee  :lol:

Offline geordiedean

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2817 on: Saturday 15 December 2018, 02:33:59 pm »
She rang "are you home ?"

Me "You rung on the landline"

That's like people ringing you in the morning

" hey are you awake"
" No I have the ability to have full blown compus mentus conversations whilst asleep"
and now Tudor's gone down for Newcastle

Offline newsted

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2818 on: Saturday 15 December 2018, 04:21:39 pm »
When you wake up you'd be able to say "compos mentis" like a normal human.
:) As you were.

Offline newsted

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2819 on: Saturday 15 December 2018, 07:45:19 pm »
When you wake up you'd be able to say "compos mentis" like a normal human.

Saying he's not a normal human because he made an error in spelling? Maybe you need to redefine normal.

Yeah, probably. I was grumpy.

I like people not to use words they don't understand. Fair comment.
:) As you were.

Offline Robster

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2820 on: Sunday 16 December 2018, 03:55:58 pm »
When you wake up you'd be able to say "compos mentis" like a normal human.
Saying he's not a normal human because he made an error in spelling? Maybe you need to redefine normal.
Yeah, probably. I was grumpy.
I like people not to use words they don't understand. Fair comment.
You mean spell, not understand. He clearly knew what it meant.
Fancy not understanding that :lol:
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Offline newsted

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2821 on: Sunday 16 December 2018, 05:05:00 pm »
When you wake up you'd be able to say "compos mentis" like a normal human.
Saying he's not a normal human because he made an error in spelling? Maybe you need to redefine normal.
Yeah, probably. I was grumpy.
I like people not to use words they don't understand. Fair comment.
You mean spell, not understand. He clearly knew what it meant.
Fancy not understanding that :lol:

:lol: Fair enough. I was having a bad day. Sorry, everyone.
:) As you were.

Offline Twinport53

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2822 on: Sunday 16 December 2018, 11:27:03 pm »
Whys it called the Tyne tunnel?

Me - Erm because it goes under the Tyne?

... Well why can't I see any water?
Hatem Ben Arfa -
I don't think he would have won us any more points than any of our current players.

After 9 losses and 1 draw in 10 matches under John Carver.

Offline geordiedean

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2823 on: Sunday 16 December 2018, 11:33:20 pm »
When you wake up you'd be able to say "compos mentis" like a normal human.

Auto correct and I clearly know what it means. You must have been having a s*** day to crucify me over that
and now Tudor's gone down for Newcastle

Offline newsted

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Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« Reply #2824 on: Monday 17 December 2018, 08:59:29 am »
Yep. Soz. :rose:
:) As you were.