Author Topic: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread  (Read 184794 times)

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Offline cp40

  • General Member
The Stupid things your Lass has said thread
« on: Friday 26 June 2009, 05:37:23 pm »
Inspired to start this thread today, after the lastest in a long line of classics from my lass.


So, im just finishing work today about 1-30 , when she rings me, to tell me her meeting at st Nicks hospital has finished.
So i offer to pick her up.

She gets in the car, and without a hint of irony.

' This place is f***ing Mad!'

 ;D ;D ;D ;D



edit, to those who dont know, its a mental hospital.
« Last Edit: Monday 9 September 2013, 09:29:16 pm by Rich »

Offline Dr. Nguyen Van Falk

  • General Member
Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread.
« Reply #1 on: Friday 26 June 2009, 05:40:52 pm »
"stalin? he's from Red Dwarf ain't he?"

Offline Pilko

  • General Member
  • Bunsen burner
Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread.
« Reply #2 on: Friday 26 June 2009, 05:58:22 pm »
Last year:

"So, is Beckham playing for England?"

"Yeah, number 18 there"

"Ah, I thought he went off to play for America?"
"Does a struggling salesman start turning up on a bicycle? No, he turns up in a newer car. Perception." - David Brent

Online Shak

  • General Member
Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread.
« Reply #3 on: Friday 26 June 2009, 06:07:33 pm »
"They have cars in Russia?!"

As we viewed the photos of our friends recent holiday.

About an hour later I went to the laptop and she had left the browser open after she'd finished with it. Was open on the wiki page entitled 'Russia'.

:lol:

Offline matta

  • General Member
  • Walk hard
Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread.
« Reply #4 on: Friday 26 June 2009, 06:07:46 pm »
"can we watch something else"(kan vi ikke se på no anna?, in norwegian)


newcastle vs boro this year.


we're still together. crazy i know :)

Offline Rocker

  • General Member
Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread.
« Reply #5 on: Friday 26 June 2009, 06:10:54 pm »
Hope you brayed her  :thup:

Offline Jimburst

  • General Member
  • Yeah Buddy!
Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread.
« Reply #6 on: Friday 26 June 2009, 06:15:19 pm »
To her mother: "you know james is catered? Well his dinners cost £4.50 a night, and if you add breakfasts onto that it's almost £40 a day!
Her mother: Do you not mean...a week?
Her: Nah, I worked it out before, it's £40 a day.

:lol:
A splatterhouse turd done in the manky toilets of a discotheque, brought on my the consumption of cowies or toot.

Offline Dave

  • Administrator
Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread.
« Reply #7 on: Friday 26 June 2009, 06:16:51 pm »
'Yes'

Offline Kaizero

  • General Member
Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread.
« Reply #8 on: Friday 26 June 2009, 06:20:18 pm »
"If you don't start paying attention to me it's over."

Easiest break-up, ever.

Lazlo

  • Guest
Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread.
« Reply #9 on: Friday 26 June 2009, 07:07:32 pm »
What number do you wear when you play football on sunday ?

'11'

Is that 5 a side ?

Offline SEMTEX

  • General Member
Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread.
« Reply #10 on: Friday 26 June 2009, 07:23:40 pm »
"If you don't start paying attention to me it's over."

Easiest break-up, ever.

I hope you replied with:

"..... what?"

Offline Pilko

  • General Member
  • Bunsen burner
Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread.
« Reply #11 on: Friday 26 June 2009, 07:32:30 pm »
'Yes'

Bet you'll update that in a year with "I do"
"Does a struggling salesman start turning up on a bicycle? No, he turns up in a newer car. Perception." - David Brent

Stephen927

  • Guest
Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread.
« Reply #12 on: Friday 26 June 2009, 07:34:43 pm »
"Thats the wrong hole"

Yeah, I know. Your point?  :bluestar:

Offline Pilko

  • General Member
  • Bunsen burner
Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread.
« Reply #13 on: Friday 26 June 2009, 07:37:37 pm »
"Thats the wrong hole"

The girl from crazy golf?
"Does a struggling salesman start turning up on a bicycle? No, he turns up in a newer car. Perception." - David Brent

Lazlo

  • Guest

Offline Cajun

  • General Member
Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread.
« Reply #15 on: Friday 26 June 2009, 07:48:50 pm »
She said something (can't remember what)
Me: Bollocks
Her (without even blinking): If I had bollocks I would teabag you!


Random bitch :lol:


Shop in town named "The Sandwich Shop"
Her: Do you think they sell sandwiches? (geniune question).

Offline Leazes1986

  • General Member
Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread.
« Reply #16 on: Friday 26 June 2009, 07:51:49 pm »
At the beach: "Is London on the other side of the water?"



Alan Shearer:

404 games for Newcastle - 206 goals
63 Caps for England - 30 goals
733 career games - 379 goals
Newcastle's all time leading goalscorer
Ended his career by scoring against the scum in a 4-1 win
Turned Man United down, but lived the dream Alan Shearer=TRUE LEGEND

Offline cp40

  • General Member
Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread.
« Reply #17 on: Friday 26 June 2009, 07:54:15 pm »
At the beach: "Is London on the other side of the water?"



 ;D ;D

what fking beach??

Offline Leazes1986

  • General Member
Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread.
« Reply #18 on: Friday 26 June 2009, 07:55:39 pm »
At the beach: "Is London on the other side of the water?"



 ;D ;D

what fking beach??

Shields  :lol:


Alan Shearer:

404 games for Newcastle - 206 goals
63 Caps for England - 30 goals
733 career games - 379 goals
Newcastle's all time leading goalscorer
Ended his career by scoring against the scum in a 4-1 win
Turned Man United down, but lived the dream Alan Shearer=TRUE LEGEND

Offline cp40

  • General Member
Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread.
« Reply #19 on: Friday 26 June 2009, 08:00:41 pm »

Offline LBW

  • TPFKA lankybellwipe
  • General Member
Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread.
« Reply #20 on: Friday 26 June 2009, 08:04:23 pm »
At the beach: "Is London on the other side of the water?"



 ;D ;D

what fking beach??

Shields  :lol:



 :laugh:



 :mackems:

I was gonna say you must be joking........ but that has to be true
"You're giving ME the 'it's naat you it's me' routine? If it's anybaady, it's ME!!"
"Ok George, it's YOU!"
"You're DAMN RIGHT IT'S ME!"

Offline Leazes1986

  • General Member
Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread.
« Reply #21 on: Friday 26 June 2009, 08:07:32 pm »
At the beach: "Is London on the other side of the water?"



 ;D ;D

what fking beach??

Shields  :lol:



 :laugh:



 :mackems:

I was gonna say you must be joking........ but that has to be true

 :lol: f*** off, she's from Jarra  :lol:


Alan Shearer:

404 games for Newcastle - 206 goals
63 Caps for England - 30 goals
733 career games - 379 goals
Newcastle's all time leading goalscorer
Ended his career by scoring against the scum in a 4-1 win
Turned Man United down, but lived the dream Alan Shearer=TRUE LEGEND

Offline TêteDeMaure

  • General Member
Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread.
« Reply #22 on: Friday 26 June 2009, 08:15:43 pm »
You must have picked her up at Margie Suttons.

Offline LBW

  • TPFKA lankybellwipe
  • General Member
Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread.
« Reply #23 on: Friday 26 June 2009, 08:19:12 pm »
At the beach: "Is London on the other side of the water?"



 ;D ;D

what fking beach??

Shields  :lol:



 :laugh:



 :mackems:

I was gonna say you must be joking........ but that has to be true

 :lol: f*** off, she's from Jarra  :lol:

Really  :kasper:

15 years ago, I was seeing a lass from Jarra called A****

Anyhoo me and a mate were playing Sensible Soccer at mine, well, my parents house, where I lived, when she appeared, fully expected. Me and my mate were starting a game (me toon - him Liverpool) and she said "Don't mind me, I'll sit and watch....... who's in the red?"

To which my mate responded "me!"

"And who's in the black?"

 :frantic:

I do not lie!
"You're giving ME the 'it's naat you it's me' routine? If it's anybaady, it's ME!!"
"Ok George, it's YOU!"
"You're DAMN RIGHT IT'S ME!"

Offline Leazes1986

  • General Member
Re: The Stupid things your Lass has said thread.
« Reply #24 on: Friday 26 June 2009, 08:37:22 pm »
 :lol: To be fair wor lass is canny intelligent, she just comes out with some stupid f***ing questions. Hasn't got a clue about any sort of geography.


Alan Shearer:

404 games for Newcastle - 206 goals
63 Caps for England - 30 goals
733 career games - 379 goals
Newcastle's all time leading goalscorer
Ended his career by scoring against the scum in a 4-1 win
Turned Man United down, but lived the dream Alan Shearer=TRUE LEGEND