Author Topic: How to lose weight and influence people  (Read 331299 times)

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toonlass

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How to lose weight and influence people
« on: Thursday 15 January 2009, 07:33:25 PM »
Ok, at the risk of getting dogs abuse from all and sundry I am going to ask for advice. I know I am opening myself up to p*ss taking from some, but hey ho, would rather have the p*ss taken out of me for trying than have the p*ss taken out of me for doing nowt about the situation.

I am overweight, have been since I had my first bairn 10 years ago, got worse when I left my violent husband and is now just something I live with. But I would like to lose weight, as I have been diagnosed with diabetes recently (my diabetic nurse is fairly s*** though, and apart from seeing me when I was first diagnosed in October last year hasn't seen me since) and I am sick of others taking the p*ss if I am honest. I eat fairly healthily (although I could do better), I drink a bit too much on a matchday (but am countering that one by taking the car to the metro station (10 miles away from home) and then a metro to the city centre, about 6 stops I think. I know I need to eat healthily and exercise more (and that is my biggest problem). I am scared of going to a gym, and I couldn't run the state I am in. I also have 3 kids, am a single parent and am doing a degree so have loads on in my life.

So does anyone have some REAL advice on how to lose the weight. How do I motivate myself when things get tough. How do I stop myself from getting down? Am wondering if a weightloss group like Weightwatchers or Slimming World would be any good (just for a bit of group support)? Would walking be enough exercise to start off with? If anyone could offer me some genuine advice about how to get going, and keep going then I would appreciate it.
« Last Edit: Friday 28 May 2010, 07:56:14 PM by Rich »

Offline Syrette

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Re: How to lose weight and influence people.
« Reply #1 on: Thursday 15 January 2009, 07:34:14 PM »
I find after watching most Newcastle matches that I don't want to eat anything for a while.

toonlass

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Re: How to lose weight and influence people.
« Reply #2 on: Thursday 15 January 2009, 07:36:13 PM »
I find after watching most Newcastle matches that I don't want to eat anything for a while.

lol, but it does kind of lead you to drink!

Offline cp40

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Re: How to lose weight and influence people.
« Reply #3 on: Thursday 15 January 2009, 07:36:22 PM »
Toon lass, i have a simple message, eat less, move more, it always works.

toonlass

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Re: How to lose weight and influence people.
« Reply #4 on: Thursday 15 January 2009, 07:38:10 PM »
Toon lass, i have a simple message, eat less, move more, it always works.

Cheers I know that  ;D but what if you have a problem with motivation?

Offline Haz

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Re: How to lose weight and influence people.
« Reply #5 on: Thursday 15 January 2009, 07:40:21 PM »
That's easier said than done when you are diabetic. Insulin is called the "Fat hormone" because it makes you retain.  Some of the oral medications have it also.

Either way, you can't just stop eating and it wont work that way. If you start exercise you have to adjust your medication accordingly.  Carbs will make you overweight and you have to take them into account too. But generally (with guidance) cut down on carbs, increase protein - move a bit more - and you should lose weight.
Drinking alcohol never solves anything. But neither does drinking milk.

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Offline cp40

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Re: How to lose weight and influence people.
« Reply #6 on: Thursday 15 January 2009, 07:41:18 PM »
Toon lass, i have a simple message, eat less, move more, it always works.

Cheers I know that  ;D but what if you have a problem with motivation?


my lass just said, tell her to watch Paul Mckenna, I can make you thin.

Offline Tooj

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toonlass

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Re: How to lose weight and influence people.
« Reply #8 on: Thursday 15 January 2009, 07:42:17 PM »
Toon lass, i have a simple message, eat less, move more, it always works.

Cheers I know that  ;D but what if you have a problem with motivation?


my lass just said, tell her to watch Paul Mckenna, I can make you thin.

Ok, is that on Sky? Can he make me tall too?


Offline NJS

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Re: How to lose weight and influence people.
« Reply #10 on: Thursday 15 January 2009, 07:48:54 PM »
I'd suggest walking and swimming as a starter for exercise - go for a canny brisk walk 2 or 3 times a week and the same with swimming - start off with just 20 mins if its a bit much then steadily increase.

Motivation is a tough one - my history was being overweight pretty much from childhood and then about 15 years ago I started having panic attacks at night from discomfort in my chest/abdomen - it turned out to be nothing to worry about apart from the obvious so I took it as a wake up call and would say "fear of death" was my starting point - that might not apply to you but its may be a prompter.

If you do get going you have to notice the differences and say "f***ing hell I feel so much better after losing 1 stone - how will it feel after 4?" - you have to get to the stage as I did where the adrenalin from exercise becomes a drug - you can slip - I have over the last couple of years (and intend to put it right this year) but once you start to think of yourself as a fit person who's slid a little rather than as a perennial fat b****** I think you'll be set for life.




Offline Andy

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Re: How to lose weight and influence people.
« Reply #11 on: Thursday 15 January 2009, 07:51:42 PM »
Read this guy's articles on the subject:

http://www.craigharper.com.au/

The only way to lose weight is to shred up your current diet -- literally throw out everything in your fridge and freezer and start again. Do it now. What are you waiting for? NOW WOMAN NOW. Then start exercising (in your home at first, if need be, or go for LONG walks) and keep up your discipline. Forget buzz words like "motivation" and "drive;" those things will only last so long. The fire burns out after a few weeks... If you want to change, discipline is the thing that will take you there.

You should set yourself some SMART goals (mnemonic acronym for: Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, Time-Measured) such as "by April I will lose 1 stone by exercising for at least thirty minutes every day" and go from there. Develop a plan of attack, stick to it. No matter what. No excuses. And don't expect to be looking like a twig within a fortnight; accept that this is a long-term thing and take it bit by bit.


Offline Shearergol

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Re: How to lose weight and influence people.
« Reply #12 on: Thursday 15 January 2009, 07:55:01 PM »
Love the way that you say you think people will take the p*ss, and then make them feel really guilty before they do it by telling us of your hardships. Sounds like you've had it pretty bad.

Personally I would just suggest walking everywhere you can. You'll soon build up your fitness which will give you more confidence before things like swimming and the gym.

It's all about burning off more than you eat. Sounds really easy, and in theory it's quite difficult when you've got a busy life. Just don't expect (and hope) to do it all at once.

Offline Clay

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Re: How to lose weight and influence people.
« Reply #13 on: Thursday 15 January 2009, 07:56:03 PM »
Eat when you're hungry and only when you're hungry, don't reach for the crisps when you feel "peckish"

When you're having something to eat try and focus on your stomach as much as possible as soon as you feel full, stop eating... don't think the rest of your dinner looks lush and it'd be a shame to waste it by throwing it out.

Also exercise, nothing too major is needed to lose weight, just cutting down on food intake will help with most of that but try and do a little.

Anyway that's all sound advice i've been given i just need to put it into practice... gained about 3 stone in the last year from sitting on my arse and my new years resolution hasn't started yet :lol:

Diets and the rest are bullshit btw... obviously eating stuff like chicken and salads will help you lose weight as opposed to eating chips and steak.. but aslong as you just eat when you're hungry and stop eating when you're full you'll notice the difference.

Offline thomas

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Re: How to lose weight and influence people.
« Reply #14 on: Thursday 15 January 2009, 07:57:04 PM »
Don't be scared of a gym. 

I'm an emotionally fragile little flower myself and the biggest thing for me, and based on the fears of what you said here and in the other thread about going to the gym or whatever so this might help, was learning to say "who cares?"  when worrying about what people will see, think or say.  It kept me away from the gym on nights I should have been working out.

Think about your average day.  How many fat broads and tubby dudes do you look at and not even give a second thought about?  That's the same for all people.  The most that might register in their little pea brains is "hey, a fat guy." 

And most people at a gym ... you don't know them, they don't know you, who cares what they think?  Find a more mature gym if you're getting s*** from someone, or report them or something.  Most people, when they're working out and they see someone obese giving a good effort, aren't thinking of ways to belittle or demean them; most offhandedly think "hey, that person's at least trying to better her/himself."  but again it leaves the realm of their immediate attention/thought process pretty quickly. 

toonlass

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Re: How to lose weight and influence people.
« Reply #15 on: Thursday 15 January 2009, 07:57:50 PM »
Cheers guys. The walking thing definitley sounds like something I can do straight away (well not now cos its dark and social services probably wouldn't approve of me leaving the bairns on their own like). The swimming is a good suggestion (and one I WILL implement in the future~but am lacking a bit in confidence to go to a swimming pool at the moment). I will have a fridge and cupboard clean out too. I definitely think that a SMART plan will help. I have done this for my debt problems and am over £400 pounds less in debt than I was two months ago, so I can achieve goals I set. Will also read that article through again. ]

I know its a long term thing, and I won't notice any change in a fortnight but I guess I will know that I am doing it.

Offline Shearergol

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Re: How to lose weight and influence people.
« Reply #16 on: Thursday 15 January 2009, 07:58:45 PM »
Don't be scared of a gym. 

I'm an emotionally fragile little flower myself and the biggest thing for me, and based on the fears of what you said here and in the other thread about going to the gym or whatever so this might help, was learning to say "who cares?"  when worrying about what people will see, think or say.

Think about your average day.  How many fat broads and tubby dudes do you look at and not even give a second thought about?  That's the same for all people.  The most that might register in their little pea brains is "hey, a fat guy." 

And most people at a gym ... you don't know them, they don't know you, who cares what they think?  Find a more mature gym if you're getting s*** from someone, or report them or something.  Most people, when they're working out and they see someone obese giving a good effort, aren't thinking of ways to belittle or demean them; most offhandedly think "hey, that person's at least trying to better her/himself."  but again it leaves the realm of their immediate attention/thought process pretty quickly. 

Fantastic post, and you're spot on about the bit in bold.

Offline davy_fulla

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Re: How to lose weight and influence people.
« Reply #17 on: Thursday 15 January 2009, 07:59:28 PM »
Our lass has just joined Slimming World today funnily enough.  Cost her a fiver for registration and a fiver everytime she goes, although she chooses how often she goes.  A few of her mates have been on it for a while and they all say how good it is.

She came back today with her starter pack and to be honest it looks spot on.  There's loads of stuff you can eat unlimited amounts of and it's proper food so no danger of starving.  You have a certain amount of 'sins' you can have per day or save them up till the end of the week and go off it with a massive pizza.

Might be worth a look.
The immortal Jackie Milburn died today - Cliff Morgan

toonlass

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Re: How to lose weight and influence people.
« Reply #18 on: Thursday 15 January 2009, 07:59:49 PM »
Love the way that you say you think people will take the p*ss, and then make them feel really guilty before they do it by telling us of your hardships. Sounds like you've had it pretty bad.

Personally I would just suggest walking everywhere you can. You'll soon build up your fitness which will give you more confidence before things like swimming and the gym.

It's all about burning off more than you eat. Sounds really easy, and in theory it's quite difficult when you've got a busy life. Just don't expect (and hope) to do it all at once.

 ;D

Offline 80

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Re: How to lose weight and influence people.
« Reply #19 on: Thursday 15 January 2009, 08:00:45 PM »
Ok, at the risk of getting dogs abuse from all and sundry I am going to ask for advice. I know I am opening myself up to p*ss taking from some, but hey ho, would rather have the p*ss taken out of me for trying than have the p*ss taken out of me for doing nowt about the situation.

I am overweight, have been since I had my first bairn 10 years ago, got worse when I left my violent husband and is now just something I live with. But I would like to lose weight, as I have been diagnosed with diabetes recently (my diabetic nurse is fairly s*** though, and apart from seeing me when I was first diagnosed in October last year hasn't seen me since) and I am sick of others taking the p*ss if I am honest. I eat fairly healthily (although I could do better), I drink a bit too much on a matchday (but am countering that one by taking the car to the metro station (10 miles away from home) and then a metro to the city centre, about 6 stops I think. I know I need to eat healthily and exercise more (and that is my biggest problem). I am scared of going to a gym, and I couldn't run the state I am in. I also have 3 kids, am a single parent and am doing a degree so have loads on in my life.

So does anyone have some REAL advice on how to lose the weight. How do I motivate myself when things get tough. How do I stop myself from getting down? Am wondering if a weightloss group like Weightwatchers or Slimming World would be any good (just for a bit of group support)? Would walking be enough exercise to start off with? If anyone could offer me some genuine advice about how to get going, and keep going then I would appreciate it.


Now to be honest, at first sight, your personal circumstances don't make you a recipe for success - diabetes, alone with three kids and in work (of sorts - at least a degree is fairly flexible). Not an easy life in itself. That said, it can conceivably be done. I'm under the impression (wrongly?) that you don't have to lose that much (when I say that I mean it's only 2-4 stone - not 10).

The single biggest piece of advice I could offer you is to replace as much of what you now drink with water. Probably the most difficult part of this is dropping alcohol, but that's also one of the worst things you can have (I'm not an expert on dealing with this stuff while having diabetes, but have to say I was under the impression its also particularly bad for that, too). Putting aside social implications, its one of the simplest things you can do, potentially cutting loads of calories and generally bad stuff out your diet (just because diet coke has no calories, it doesn't mean it isn't filled with s***). It means all the calories you will intake will come from food - something more necessary, something more easily gauged, something more consistent (you don't need to eat more on a hot day as a rule). I'd put a sum of money on you feeling better generally for being better hydrated, too.

Walking is excellent exercise. The more you can fit in your day the better.

Re: groups... I'm not naturally a fan of those kinds of things, but it's up to you; you'll know better than me. I suspect they'd just magnify your feelings towards the results you receive - people to notice you succeed or fail. There's a gamble there, and it's questionable whether you need them in the first place. Ultimately, motivation will come from within. That you're starting a thread like this is in itself a good sign. If you start and stick with the water and walking, hopefully you'll get somewhere and see some light at the end of the tunnel.

Edit: Oh yeah, another thing - half a stone a month is a good rate to ultimately aim for. Expect nothing particularly good to happen for a couple of months, though and just stick at it.

Another thing - gyms; the less commercial the better. If you're gonna find a bad one, I'd bank on it being branded.
Maturity is not Passivity.

Online cubaricho

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Re: How to lose weight and influence people.
« Reply #20 on: Thursday 15 January 2009, 08:02:10 PM »
Whenever possible, make your own food.  It will help you with portion size and the key to losing weight (as always) is eat less, move more.  I found that preparing my own food though helped out immensely because you are in direct control of your portions (you'd be surprised how much a half cup of pasta is).  Also, when you're out to eat, try eating slower because you will fill up quicker and once you're about half way through just put your napkin on top of your food (there are a lot of superfluous calories you get when just "picking" at your food).  If the napkin isn't enough just pour a bunch of salt on your food to ruin it so you won't eat anymore.  If you're looking for a structured approach and want to attend classes I would recommend Weight Watchers (do they have that in the UK?).  It's the best program when it comes to changing your actual lifestyle as opposed to just crash dieting.
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Offline davy_fulla

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Re: How to lose weight and influence people.
« Reply #21 on: Thursday 15 January 2009, 08:05:35 PM »
Don't be scared of a gym. 

I'm an emotionally fragile little flower myself and the biggest thing for me, and based on the fears of what you said here and in the other thread about going to the gym or whatever so this might help, was learning to say "who cares?"  when worrying about what people will see, think or say.

Think about your average day.  How many fat broads and tubby dudes do you look at and not even give a second thought about?  That's the same for all people.  The most that might register in their little pea brains is "hey, a fat guy." 

And most people at a gym ... you don't know them, they don't know you, who cares what they think?  Find a more mature gym if you're getting s*** from someone, or report them or something.  Most people, when they're working out and they see someone obese giving a good effort, aren't thinking of ways to belittle or demean them; most offhandedly think "hey, that person's at least trying to better her/himself."  but again it leaves the realm of their immediate attention/thought process pretty quickly. 

Fantastic post, and you're spot on about the bit in bold.

I'd second that as well.  I go to a gym where there's the muscle-clad posers and others who would be classed as obese I suppose.  None of them give a monkey's about how other people look and everyone is just there to concentrate on their own workout - whether that be lifting as much as possible or just walking on the treadmill for half an hour.

Give the local gym a call as I suspect they'll probbly do free inductions before you join so you can see what they offer.  This will also get you over that initial fear of going in to the gym.

 After your first workout you'll feel class I tell ya!
The immortal Jackie Milburn died today - Cliff Morgan

toonlass

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Re: How to lose weight and influence people.
« Reply #22 on: Thursday 15 January 2009, 08:06:32 PM »
Whenever possible, make your own food.  It will help you with portion size and the key to losing weight (as always) is eat less, move more.  I found that preparing my own food though helped out immensely because you are in direct control of your portions (you'd be surprised how much a half cup of pasta is).  Also, when you're out to eat, try eating slower because you will fill up quicker and once you're about half way through just put your napkin on top of your food (there are a lot of superfluous calories you get when just "picking" at your food).  If the napkin isn't enough just pour a bunch of salt on your food to ruin it so you won't eat anymore.  If you're looking for a structured approach and want to attend classes I would recommend Weight Watchers (do they have that in the UK?).  It's the best program when it comes to changing your actual lifestyle as opposed to just crash dieting.

Thanks for that. I always cook my own foods from scratch. I don't think my freezer has ever seen a chicken nugget to be honest, lol. Good tip about the napkin/salt.

Offline oldtype

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Re: How to lose weight and influence people.
« Reply #23 on: Thursday 15 January 2009, 08:06:35 PM »
I've got a rather awkward metabolism that makes me either gain or lose weight extremely rapidly (I can pretty much consistently lose two stone a month  or more when I try, but can also gain that much if I'm not excercising/drinking a lot,) so I have a bit of experience with this.

Generally, when I need to go into "weight-loss" mode, I have two simple rules: eat absolutely nothing outside of three meals a day, and work out thirty minutes every day at around the same time. If you can pull that off consistently, you really don't need any fancy diets or tricks.

As many have mentioned already on this thread, cardio is generally what you want to focus on for working out. Walking/running/bike riding are all good, just pick what's comfortable to you and do it daily.

Offline Andy

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Re: How to lose weight and influence people.
« Reply #24 on: Thursday 15 January 2009, 08:07:14 PM »
Don't be scared of a gym. 

I'm an emotionally fragile little flower myself and the biggest thing for me, and based on the fears of what you said here and in the other thread about going to the gym or whatever so this might help, was learning to say "who cares?"  when worrying about what people will see, think or say.

Think about your average day.  How many fat broads and tubby dudes do you look at and not even give a second thought about?  That's the same for all people.  The most that might register in their little pea brains is "hey, a fat guy." 

And most people at a gym ... you don't know them, they don't know you, who cares what they think?  Find a more mature gym if you're getting s*** from someone, or report them or something.  Most people, when they're working out and they see someone obese giving a good effort, aren't thinking of ways to belittle or demean them; most offhandedly think "hey, that person's at least trying to better her/himself."  but again it leaves the realm of their immediate attention/thought process pretty quickly. 

Fantastic post, and you're spot on about the bit in bold.

Yep, the bit in bold is bang-on the money. The vast majority of people are too self-absorbed to give more than the slightest s*** about anything external to themselves. 80's advice about water is good too.

Keep us updated on your progress, and let your family and friends know what you're doing -- it will give you an external pressure to keep you going, and it'll also give you a support system if you need it.