Andy Carroll (now playing for Amiens SC)

He's literally Bruce's only hope this season isn't he. As soon as he and Gayle are fit, that's plan A.

 

Cant see him starting until xmas, we will be rooted to the foot of the league on 1 point

Yeah, don't disagree. And as soon as he does he'll be out for another 11 games.

We’ll have been hoping for an easy first game in the Carabao Cup so we could have pushed the ‘Andy Carroll returns’ angle for his second debut in the next round.

He's literally Bruce's only hope this season isn't he. As soon as he and Gayle are fit, that's plan A.

Bruce has no idea how to get the ball from one end of the pitch to the other so yes. Hoofing the ball up long to a big lad will be his prayer for redemption.

Completely forgot he signed for us.

I'll always see this as a desperate attempt to curry favour with the fans. Because realistically he's done the square root of fuck all since he left us but be injured.

Suppose he's only got to better joselu's attempt.

Andy Carroll may probably be the last NUFC player that I adored.

Plenty of reasons for that - he is oldschool type of battering ram striker that is so rare nowadays, he fits in Newcastle's "local hero" obsession, he is fucked in the head just enough to be an interesting figure, and he was superb for us for season and a half.

The thing is, I think AC could have been one of not just Newcastle, but England's greats - IF he played 30 years ago. Back then, apart from few players - strikers were groomed to be physically dominant in order to wrestle with the defenders, pick up long balls and play a simple game. And Andy's abilities are superb for that kind of play, I'd dare to say he could have been a world beater back then.

But football has changed. There are way more then one strategy to penetrate the defense without a battering ram striker, hell - latest fashion is that you don't even need typical strikers in order to do so. There are few leftover antiquities in the footballing world now when it comes to big, strong, dominant strikers - Lukaku may be the perfect example, but they just don't work anymore. In order to facilitate that type of player you have to adjust your whole tactical plan to make it work, and managers are reluctant to do so, naturally.

That's what I believe happened to him when he left Newcastle.

Liverpool had a modern all-round striker in Suarez, and Andy just couldn't cut it tactically. He was young, boisterous, full of confidence... and with bags of pressure on his shoulders. Then came the injuries, and he rest is history - well, not the version Andy Carroll hoped for.

Now that he's back, being 30 and plagued with injuries, we cannot hope for even a glimpse of what he had to offer almost decade ago. We are most certainly not going to build our team around him, and the best we could hope for is an impact sub that can change the way of play and support the wings after long balls.

And that is a damn shame if you ask me. We had a hero, and now we have a washed up former player whose decline is there to reminds us every day all of what happened to our club in the past ten years or slightly more.

Newcastle is Andy Carroll - bags of potential and "could haves", but is rotting on the bench of the footballing world.

Respect to Carroll for going right back to his roots, choosing to do his rehab in a grotty old gym in whatever shanty he was dragged up.  Oh, that's our training facilities - isn't it?

There’s no way that gym belongs to a premier league football club

Reckon that's an old cathode ray TV in the top left corner

EVERYTHING AVAILABLE NOW AT SPUNK DIRECT!!! - NEXT DAY DELIVERY ON ALL ORDERS OVER 0.99p

Reckon that's an old cathode ray TV in the top left corner

It's a speaker

Those facilities, holy shit.

Looks like a uni gym

Perfectly adequate, weights are weights. Where's the issue?

I reckon Carroll never plays one minute under Brucie, he'll get the tin tack before AC can hobble onto the pitch.

Keep forgetting this even happened.

I reckon Carroll never plays one minute under Brucie, he'll get the tin tack before AC can hobble onto the pitch.

Our owner gave Alan Pardew an 8 year contract and only sacked McLaren/Carver when we were already doomed. What makes you think he’ll act swiftly and decisively to sack Bruce?!

Fucking hell it's like a community centre workout spot  Reckon by night time they'll have the bingo on with the pigeon woman front row with a shit eating grin, massive dapper and 8 slips in front of him.

 

Respect to Carroll for going right back to his roots, choosing to do his rehab in a grotty old gym in whatever shanty he was dragged up.  Oh, that's our training facilities - isn't it?

My school gym was better than that and I left school 30 years ago. That Gym for a premier league club is fucking embarrassing and just typifies what an absolute shit show we are as an organization one that is way way out of its depth as a premier league entity in every department and aspect

 

Respect to Carroll for going right back to his roots, choosing to do his rehab in a grotty old gym in whatever shanty he was dragged up.  Oh, that's our training facilities - isn't it?

 

My school gym was better than that and I left school 30 years ago. That Gym for a premier league club is fucking embarrassing and just typifies what an absolute shit show we are as an organization one that is way way out of its depth as a premier league entity in every department and aspect

 

Mike Ashley has never set foot in a gym in his life - that'll look state of the art to him

are we sure that's the main gym and not some small gym used for physio and recovery etc?

Pretty bold of you to assume we have more than one gym

 

Respect to Carroll for going right back to his roots, choosing to do his rehab in a grotty old gym in whatever shanty he was dragged up.  Oh, that's our training facilities - isn't it?

Oh my fucking god. Maybe that's a bad angle?

Legit question - How many clubs actually have swimming pools and aquatic facilities? Tried researching it but it's a tough thing to find.

Man Utd do...

The Main Building, which houses the Manchester United first team, was opened in the pre-season of 2000. It comprises two levels. The ground floor includes; a large gymnasium, indoor running tracks, rehabilitation training hall, squash and basketball courts, weights room, 25-metre swimming pool, remedial and hydrotherapy pools, spa pool, jacuzzi, underwater treadmills, sauna and steam rooms, sunbeds (for Vitamin D), yoga rooms, administration and executive offices, seven team changing rooms, staff changing rooms, laundry rooms and five kit/boot rooms. The first floor includes; the first team manager's office (overlooking outdoor training pitches), manager's personal assistant office, assistant manager's office, coaches offices, match and opposition analysis suite, physiotherapy treatment rooms (with 10 physio beds), massage rooms, first aid station, doctor's office, physio's office (overlooking swimming pools, rehab hall, and weight room), classrooms, conference rooms, charity staff offices (Manchester United Foundation), restaurant seating over 100 people, player's lounge, recreation and games rooms, as well as an elevated, covered viewing gallery overlooking the outdoor pitches. The Main Building was extended and updated in 2013.[4]

This makes me sad.

The silver size "35" beachball once used to teach Joselu ball to feet co-ordination

It reminds me of one of those pieces that looks at the humble beginnings of a boxer, having to train in an old soviet era gym. But hey, we can't compete with Man City for gym equipment.