Topic: The little things in life...

[Ste]

Using a disabled toilet when the proper ones are out of order, it's like luxury. This one in McDonalds had like a shiny pane above the bowl where I could stand and admire the size of my manhood while I take a pee.

Did no one question you using the disabled toilet?

The sign in McDonalds said use the disabled one downstairs cos they had closed upstairs for cleaning.

I always use the disabled toilets. The proper one smells like ten year old p*ss and s*** mixed, and look like it too.

I like a man with special needs.

[Keefaz]

Stalking. Sitting in the living room looking through someone's window opposite, they caught us so we put one of the girls number up, he text then we text him updates of what he was doing, he looks petrified!

f***ing students.

[Messi]

Stalking. Sitting in the living room looking through someone's window opposite, they caught us so we put one of the girls number up, he text then we text him updates of what he was doing, he looks petrified!

f***ing students.

Another good one.

[LucaAltieri]

Stalking. Sitting in the living room looking through someone's window opposite, they caught us so we put one of the girls number up, he text then we text him updates of what he was doing, he looks petrified!

f***ing students.

Another good one.

Are you a primary or secondary man?

[Messi]

If they've got hair, they're too old.

[Mowen]

When a drunkard walks up and down the platform singing 'bad boys' by the x factor winner. He had a lovely voice, I'd have chipped in if he was doing it for money. I think he was just p*ssed though.

[Mowen]

Using a disabled toilet when the proper ones are out of order, it's like luxury. This one in McDonalds had like a shiny pane above the bowl where I could stand and admire the size of my manhood while I take a pee.

Did no one question you using the disabled toilet?

The sign in McDonalds said use the disabled one downstairs cos they had closed upstairs for cleaning.

I always use the disabled toilets. The proper one smells like ten year old p*ss and s*** mixed, and look like it too.

Disabled toilets are f***ing quality. We refer to going to the disabled toilet as 'going business class'. When you've got a bad hangover at work and you need to go to the toilets for a kip going business class is brilliant, you can turn the light off, spread out a bit, the works.

[Pilko]

"going business class"

[Gash?]

Winning a heads or tales for a meaningless thing (getting to pick the quiz team name)
We are Ashley Mckay and the Parasites by the way!

[Mowen]

Winning a heads or tales for a meaningless thing (getting to pick the quiz team name)
We are Ashley Mckay and the Parasites by the way!

I was about to say you might mean McKeag before I realised it's probably just your name.

[Jill]

Getting an electricity bill when you're absolutely skint and can't physically imagine spending any money ever again.. and being in credit. 

Just a bit of credit mind, wouldn't want them to be sitting on loads of money I could be spending. 

[indi]

When your washing machine breaks down, but you drag the f***er out and drag the old one that's been in the garage for 6 years back in from the cold and it works perfectly and is even clean, despite it's time lurking in the cold and damp.

[heza09]

When your washing machine breaks down, but you drag the f***er out and drag the old one that's been in the garage for 6 years back in from the cold and it works perfectly and is even clean, despite it's time lurking in the cold and damp.

Why buy a new one when the old one works?

[ChezGiven]

When your washing machine breaks down, but you drag the f***er out and drag the old one that's been in the garage for 6 years back in from the cold and it works perfectly and is even clean, despite it's time lurking in the cold and damp.

Why buy a new one when the old one works?

Not had a girlfriend?

[indi]

When your washing machine breaks down, but you drag the f***er out and drag the old one that's been in the garage for 6 years back in from the cold and it works perfectly and is even clean, despite it's time lurking in the cold and damp.

Why buy a new one when the old one works?

I didn't buy it, it was a freebie from my Mam and Dad, was much more efficient and so-forth.

[BarackObama]

When you have a party and people leave shitloads of drink.

[ChezGiven]

s*** party?

[BarackObama]

s*** guests.

[ChezGiven]

s*** happens.

[BarackObama]

Puffs man.

[ChezGiven]

Stop knocking them out with k then.

[BarackObama]

 

Sadly that was actually the case, people forget to drink on that s***. Atleast I woke up to a fridge full of drink though.

[ChezGiven]

Class.

[Kid Icarus]

Remembering a school nickname for someone called 'Chris cakey dudds' and then proceeding to p*ss myself laughing at it.

[heza09]

When your washing machine breaks down, but you drag the f***er out and drag the old one that's been in the garage for 6 years back in from the cold and it works perfectly and is even clean, despite it's time lurking in the cold and damp.

Why buy a new one when the old one works?

I didn't buy it, it was a freebie from my Mam and Dad, was much more efficient and so-forth.

Coolio.